Well, it seems my dress was the catalyst for my first negative experience within the Lolita community.  I received three messages on Tumblr, the first anonymous, then I turned off the option to be anonymous, the second and third from the same individual.  My dress was called clownish, garish, childish, I was told it was not elegant, and that I “missed the mark.”  They did not like the colors I chose, nor the hot air balloon print that I used as my inspiration for the dress.  In the whole of three messages, they gave only the compliment that I seem like a good seamstress, but the rest was all insulting the dress.

I ended up blocking the person from my tumblr, mainly because I felt myself about to retaliate and get mad at them, and I did not want to stoop to that.  My friends all say to ignore it, that the person was just being a troll, but it does not change the fact that it hurt.  The dress was supposed to be bright and fun and summer feeling.  It was my first ever attempt at making a Lolita dress, and pretty much my first real attempt at dressing Lolita (as the first time was done with what I had available), and I was just excited for how the dress turned out and now it is all a little spoiled.  I was nervous enough to begin with, and now I don’t know if I will attempt making another Lolita dress anytime soon.  I had even been trying to design a fabric print last night, but now, I think I am going to shelf that project.

When it comes down to it, there are good ways to give a person feedback and there are bad ways to give a person feedback.  And maybe the dress was not the pinnacle of pretty princess elegance, but elegance is also about the person, and I know that were I giving a person feedback on something like that, I would have more elegance in how I did so.

Oreo cookie feedback means sandwiching a bad between two goods, not putting one speck of good in a pile of bad.

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